I hate you hormones

Have you ever felt like no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, that it's just not quite good enough.  I like to think that I am a fairly capable human being, until my wife is pregnant that is!  At that time I apparently lose my ability to preform even the most basic of tasks to even a somewhat satisfactory level.  Laundry,  how hard can this one be?  You simply put the cloths in, add detergent,  and turn it on right?  Wrong.  Apparently you can not wash towels with a Candy Cane Princess Dress!  Of coarse not, all the candy canes fall off and the little mesh skirt will be ripped to shreds!  You can not put your wife's clothes away for her either, this is a no-no,  you have no idea where they go, and will have no idea what you did with them when she come to you asking what the hell you did with them. (Side note: never wash the pile of clothes next to the laundry hamper,  yes they are dirty, but they must be hand washed by Asian monks in a sacred mountain stream with detergent that fell from the sky during the eclipse of a blue moon. aka: they're delicates, don't touch them)

Moving on, because I am clearly unfit for laundry duty.  Shall we try to help in the kitchen?  Oh look the dish washer is full,  this should be easy let me put these away this should be helpful.  Wrong!  Wrong? How could I have screwed this up you might ask?  I was asking my self this same question.  My wife: "Did you put those dishes away that where in the dishwasher?"  Me: (very proud of myself for doing so and happy that she noticed) "Why yes I did, your welcome."  My wife's next comments were not entirely what I had expected, you know gracious, thankful, loving, and whatnot.  In fact they where quite the opposite!  My question is how the hell was I supposed to know that she had shut the dishwasher off halfway through so that she could hear the TV last night?  Do you think that she could tell they weren't clean if she didn't have this key bit of information that I was oblivious of?  Surely any halfway competent person would have noticed and simply restarted the dishwasher rather than put dirty dishes in every cabinet in the kitchen! Surely?!?  So I said to myself, "Self, you just aren't cut out for doing the dishes."

So... being incompetent  at the most basic of basic house hold tasks I find myself in a position to not be of much use to my pregnant wife.  So when the time came that she asked me to get her a glass of water, I complied without hesitation.  I brought her a glass of water into the living room where she was lying on the couch,  by the time I get back to the kitchen I hear a very frustrated yell "BABE!"
What could possibly be wrong with that?!  My preggo wife was apparently too tired to sit up to drink her water and had spilt most of it on her shirt.  This was all my fault, she let me know: "Babe you put too damn much water in the glass and I spilt it!"  How stupid of me for not realizing that a pregnant woman has the same coordination when it comes to drinks as my two four-year old kids do.  I hate you hormones, I hate you!


  Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.